I am not sure whats more upsetting.....when I feel the low I go through when I think of mama (which is often), the heart stop in the middle of the day, even the fond memories that have a sad feel.
Or when I feel the low that others i love go through....nanima, betu, dolly, mummy, even mami....each of them so dependent on him in their own way....now so lost....lost in despair that seems to over ride everything else...their pain is sometimes so intense that I would like to feed them all a truckload of prozac to just dull it.....unfortunately, much as I try, i cant be the prozac.
I remember once saying this to unni (in a much much different context)...the pain of the ones you love is more unbearable than your own pain, because of the helplessness....this remains so true even today....
I am off for my own prozac...a quiet dinner with Shw....an episode of Mad Abt You....a long walk...a few pages of a murder mystery...and then sleep.
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