My self-important, pompous annual assessment of the movies of 2014

2014 was possibly one of the most exciting as far as Hindi cinema was concerned. For one, the trend of the last few years appears to have intensified – the truly “big” movies generated lots of hot, rancid air and made big bucks and the “semi-big” ones balanced both creative and financial success. Also, the range of powerful performances from female actors was immense – from Tabu to Rani to Kangana and so was the range of subjects – from several rom-coms and its variants to serious, gut wrenching cinema.

For me personally, I was constantly surprised - either pleasantly or unpleasantly. Is that a sign that I am no longer able to accurately predict the artistic merit of a movie? Ouch. A bigger Ouch (in a good way) was Alia Bhatt - someone I wrote off, but she delivered a range of characters that can put most of her senior contemporaries to shame.

Movies I saw and loved -

·         Highway – this one is the one I love; even as I acknowledge its flaws, I connect with it. The journey of self exploration, the straight-from-the-heart performance by Alia, the music that’s part of the narrative.

·         Queen – possibly one of the most flawless movies I have ever seen, it has more nuances every time on watches it. One of those movies where you live the character’s life and laugh and cry with her. Also ground-breaking in so many ways.

·         Ugly – so ugly, yet so beautiful. A well-paced thriller, with layers that creep up on you without you even realizing it. Gripping in its depiction of the darkest underbelly of our lives, a much-darker version of my old favorites - Satya & Company.

·         Haider – I wanted a repeat of Maqbool & Omkara but didn’t get it. Comparisons aside, this was possibly the best A-list movie this year, with compelling performances and a multi-layered script.

·         Khoobsurat – the best surprise of the year. I would pitch it against the best Meg Ryan rom-coms. Super production values, loads of laughter, pitch-perfect supporting cast and a dreamy leading man.

·         Finding Fanny – quirky black comedy. Reminded me of the earlier Johny Depp movies. Again, brilliant performances and what detailing.

·         Hasee Toh Phasee – most underrated movie of the year. It’s a genuinely funny romance, with OTT characters and pretty good music. Also broke a lot of new ground as it reversed traditional gender roles in movies.

·         2 States – another pleasant surprise. Both the romance and the familial emotion was relatable, and the music helped.

·         Mardaani – Reasonably well-made, it was elevated by the absolutely spot-on social issue that it highlighted, and a solid performance by both the “hero” and the “villain”. Weirdly satisfying climax.

·         Humpty Sharma Ki Dulhania – not really a very good movie, but the charm of the lead actors carried it through and I can call it a favorite. Could have been much, much better especially if it had good music.

·         Filmistan – wasn’t positioned well. It’s quite a serious movie. Not very well paced, but it was a good experiment and we need to see more of this.

Movies that disappointed –

·         Happy New Year…I wanted a full blown Bollywood entertainer, I got instant gratification crap

·         PK – over-simplified and the most anti-climatic climax ever

·         Bobby Jasoos  – such amazing raw material, and such a forgettable product

Movies that I didn’t see but would probably have liked – Dedh Ishqiya, Main Tera Hero, Mary Kom, Bhootnath Returns

Movies that I didn’t see and I am glad I didn’t – Kick, Bang Bang, Gunday

Movies that I saw and I am sad I did - Holiday

Darkened paths and more ranting

Once again, there are swirls of color around me. Red, green, purple...all tinged with grey and a hint of blackness. It is as if I am viewing a rich tapestry which on a closer look reveals a design that contains no beginning and no end...and when you turn it over, there's just a single color.

Yes, I am being dramatic. Maybe I am just influenced by the latest season of Project Runway that I am glued to right now. Or the hilarious Diary of a Social Butterfly that I am reading. Maybe it's the situations at work which could generate Dilbert strips for another decade. It could also be the virtual blue and orange worlds of the dating apps, reflection a range of sensibilities and attitudes so wide that it could either be the subject of an independent scholarly study or just drive a barely sane person over the tip. People play a part too, the grief and pain of loved ones seeping into your own experiences. Or it could just boil down to the dramatic 20 degrees difference between the maximum and minimum temperatures that eerily reflects the reality.

Because a dramatic difference there is. Even as life throttles along like an ageing Rajdhani determined to prove its worth in a faster world, I tip-toe along the sides of holes that promise an entry into a labyrinthe I most certainly don't want to get into. I dont even know where the darkened paths start and where they end, if they do. At each step, choices befuddle me as one appears more uninteresting than the other. And the ones that dont, seem to be closed to me. It could be some weird version of a video game too, where the moment I pay attention to a choice it becomes unavailable to me. In which case it's my own mind playing games with me. And that's another path altogether. A path that I probably do need to trudge down though. Because the others are not going anywhere. And by extension, neither are my career or relationships or my skills.

I remember the Katy series...which included a title called What Katy Did Next. For some reason, I keep remembering the series and that book. Because what I do next is something that's never clear to me. The gap between what I can do, want to do, should do, will do, and am offered to is often too wide. But again, maybe it isn't. Maybe the gap is only in my mind. But do I have the strength to try and deal with that gap, and all that it entails?

Or should I let it be? Sit on the train and get off at whatever station seems reasonably attractive? And till then, live with the swirls of color around me. Boredom, restlessness, inertia, irritation, energy, speed. All with that tinge.

 

The Ramgarh poem :)

 

A Tale of Two Tourists on a Weekend Trip

 

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,

But they are certainly not made for Sudeep;

Who prefers his walks to be a stroll,

Along pretty little trails, or maybe the mall.

 

 

Ryan, on the other hand, is smitten

By the thick shrubbery and the mud that’s hidden;

Yes, the same mud that’s turned slippery in the rain,

And causes Sudeep to fall, not once but twice, and cry out in pain!

 

 

But one must be fair,

Or at least as fair as one can be;

To the characters of this tale,

Hearty drinkers of tea.

 

Sudeep has a lot of experience of holidays,

But sadly not of the trekking variety;

Which is why his shoes sparkle blue,

And may appear just a bit flighty.

 

They do well on walks,

Along paved roads and air-conditioned malls;

But put them on a slippery slope of mud,

And they are found to wail “Oh I am a dud!”

 

With five inches over Sudeep

(In height I mean),

The outdoorsy Ryan strides boldly forward.

Not unlike a determined moonbeam.

 

I am sure he is secretly relieved

At having discarded shorts in favor of jeans,

Especially when huge bushes graze his legs,

And he gets chased by leeches & bees!

 

An hour later as the weary trekkers return,

In the evening light that’s fading;

Ryan turns to Sudeep and, flashing that smile,

Exclaims “How invigorating”!

 

At the room, equilibrium is restored,

Over vodka, and martini, and chocolate…and more;

And the holiday continued on its vein,

Of being a compendium of experiences,

Some adventurous, some tame.

 

This was certainly not an impulsive trip,

It had been planned for months.

But the date and place had been recently decided

When, due to erroneous calculations,

Ramgarh came out trumps. 

 

 

So Ryan and Sudeep started out from Delhi,

On Independence Day, when they hoped the roads would be empty;

Armed with pretty bags and lots of snacks,

Don’t smirk at their enthusiasm, cut them some slack!

 

 

For little they did know the nightmare that awaited them,

That started with a puncture,

And made Sudeep cluck like an irritated hen.

Then came traffic, of a size not seen before;

Not even the rancorous sound of the car horns,

Could drown out Ryan’s angry roars!

 

 

Long rows of cars stretched in front of toll booths,

Which turned up every few kilometers;

To turn the travelers from Delhi, and Gurgaon, and Noida,

Into queues that were long and bitter.

 

 

But the icing on the cake was still due,

And the cliché came true,

In the form of rains at Haldwani,

Such a downpour, it turned into a mini-tsunami!

 

 

Alas! The hills that day were not alive

With the sound of music;

Instead they bore mute witness,

To throngs of tourists that would soon lose it

 

 

13 hours after they started from Gurgaon,

They reached the resort, nestled in the green hills of Kumaon.

Their room was at the top of the hill,

With a view for which many would kill;

Unfortunately their room was also unlike any other,

We could even call it “Las Vegas meets Lajpat Nagar”.

 

The next two days made up for the journey,

Sunny and free of rain was the sky;

In the lush, green home of the famous Geetanjali,

Ryan & Sudeep stepped out with their heads held high J

 

They walked the long road to Neemrana Bungalows,

Where the setting was quaint and lunch delicious;

Along the way they halted at a sweet old library,

Home to Hindi literature, heaven for the reader voracious

 

A trip to Bhimtal was duly made,

With the obligatory boat ride and tea on the steps;

And to recover from the crowds & the aesthetic shockers,

Ryan made a beeline to the nursery and picked out their best.

 

There was of course the aforementioned trek,

And a few smaller excursions here & there;

But the agenda was largely of relaxation,

And, for Sudeep, to stay out of the sun’s glare.

 

 

Heavy tomes in bright colors were hungrily devoured,

In places as varied as the pool side and the loo;

Movie classics were also pulled out,

A musical, a comedy, and a drama too.

 

The daily food schedule was faithfully adhered to,

Despite the variations in quality and taste;

Supplemented by chai, coffee & “Madeira”,

As well as salted snacks & chocolates consumed in haste.

 

But the true charm of the weekend was in none of this,

It lay in the peaceful green of the hills;

The mists that rose, the brooks that bubbled,

The chill in the air, the silence that never troubled.

 

Now we prepare for the return to the choked city,

Praying for a comfortable journey as we start;

Leaving behind a weekend well documented in cameras,

And also occupying a place in our hearts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Corporate torpor

Didn't I just ambitiously declare my comeback last week? Only to disappear yet again? Yet another sign of how gloriously indisciplined and inconsistent I have become. And yet am I allowed to wallow in self-disgust? No. Quick and dirty is what my lifestyle demands...so all I can do is administer a few well-deserved figurative kicks to myself and come back here. Ah well...that's a topic for another day.

For now my topic is the surprisingly stable and calming nature of work presentations. Having just sat through 8 hours of presentations as part of a panel for half yearly business excellence awards, I use these words very consciously.

Stable - because ever since I gained corporate consciousness (i.e. approximately 13 years ago), I have been watching similar presentations being delivered by similar looking and similarly attired people using similar tones and words. The quality of the presentations vary widely but other than, the overall format and tone are replacable by one another...across industry, organization and geography.

Calming - because in a period of intense change, this kind of un-change calms one. You wrestle with newer technologies, with the attitudes of the young 'uns, with the moving train of expectations...and then suddenly you are in a room where you look at a schedule of presentations, surrounded by others of similarly potruding bellies and looks of self-conscious importance, and think to yourself - "ah, at least this has not changed"

And finally, Surprising...because...what the hell! Everything has changed...and I mean EVERYTHING! From the way we talk (in corporate jargon unintelligible to the layman) to the way we dress (flat fronts please, else you are a loser) to the way we type (well, we didnt type earlier) to the way we lead (consultative leadership preferably) to the way we follow (with an opinion and a sense of entitlement) to the way we think (like a child with ADD) to the way we bloody shit (with an option to the either wash or wipe).

And yet we still haven't been able to figure out a less cumbersome, time consuming, shamelessly hierarchical, borderline humiliating, template-driven way to do this kind of suff?

Unbelievable (incidentally, one of my most over-used words for a while now)

Back

Like the faint rumblings that signal an imminent visit to the nearest washroom, random thoughts, observation and pithy lines have been making their presence felt in the caverns of my mind recently. Following time honored tradition, this conglomeration of signals led to the starting up of the roller coaster, which had been lying happily (or unhappily) dormant (or sulkily silent) for the last year or so. And since I have absolutely no normal way of expressing the roller coaster - no tantrums, no crying fits, no mindless orgies, no drinking binges, no anxiety attacks, no excruciating workouts, no expensive therapy - I turn to myself and land up here.

Before the reader (i.e. the future me) takes a scared gulp in anticipation of the self-indulgent vomit that he will be forced to wade through, I must make clear my resolve to avoid going down the path of microscopic level of self dissection. What I am going to do is to just open a blank page each morning (or afternoon, or evening...not night) and just write about whatever is top of my mind. I could also dig into the recesses and finger things out.