The dance of perfection

Each day is another interlude as I set out, feet tapping to whatever genre of music life has decided to play for these moments, in search of perfection.

Today's instrumentals were a little warm, breezy, a little sunny, with fluffy clouds. My first step was hesitant, but I was in good hands with K. Short, pleasant yet provoking, it was ideal for the next, longer moves. Settled into wicker chairs in front of a vista of greenery, the beats moved faster. Challenges dealt with by thought through steps; unexpected discoveries that brought sudden smiles to the face; eyes furrowed, then relaxed, then furrowed again. I dont remember what all we spoke about (life, decisions, choices, careers, organizations, culture, awakenings....) but I know I learnt a lot...about R and about myself. I needed a break. Stepping onto the sidelines, I browsed through the books on display at the Strand book sale (an old favorite haunt), allowing myself to absorb the beauty of others. But one can only remain still for so long....and appropriately, it was L who brought me back to the floor in his own quiet, comforting way. Long drive, long walk, long conversation. About me, myself. About him. Current preoccupations, past baggage, future plans. A symphony so subtle that all moves felt effortless and untiring, each step yielding more energy than it used. Before I could sink to dangerous comfort levels, it was time to switch gears. A fast drive, racy music, loud, catchy, rocking. And then back home. A last conversation, that half - expected stumble after the heady moves. Ironically, with M. Again - short, provoking, disturbing.. there's so much one can do, but there's also so much one can't.

The music's toned down a bit but continues to play in the background. Tom and Jerry provides easy amusement as I look back at my four partners for the day - with fondness, and some irritation; with a lot of love, and a little anger; with a sense of comfort, and a bit of helplessness. With a lot of gratitude - for getting me this close to perfection.