a quickie full of emotions

i just came back from a delhi trip.....took friday n monday off and went for 4 days to basically meet dolly n mummy before they go to dhaka in 1st week of july.....i was pretty unwell when i left fr here, primarily due to sheer exhaustion, and have come back even more exhausted.,,,,dont know where this will end, have a sneaky suspicion it will end where all things end, at the doors of death.

decent trip...not unbearably hot in delhi, abt 39 degrees......spent time with both of them and of course met nanima, masi n mama etc....went for movie (dev - excellent) n dilli haat as usual......mummy's of course apprehensive n emotional abt the near future, basically i had gone just for the comfort level.....all 3 of us are mainly thinking of nanima who wl be left alone now, thats whats killing all of us,.....

had been looking fwd to seeing shekhar's son (harshit) but was v disappointed when i reached there and got to know that SS is in china......then got to know he's coming back monday night.....so i went to pick him up at 11 last nite, then went to his place, met kiddo (who was thankfully awake) and came back...(yes, got just 1 hr of sleep last nite, and am back in office now)..kiddo is really cute. my heart went out to him n i am a devoted slave for the rest of his life.....on first instinct, he looks like cheenu, but features are a bit like shekhar's. but shekhar's life is in a mess...key cause being of course the early marriage n fatherhood, which he cant handle along with his work.

now am back at work...v tired....mentally, physically n emotionally.........keeping control on emotions n thoughts ; making tough decisions ; living up to yr own expectations as a human being, professional, son, friend ; living a strenuous physical life....all of this is getting to me now and i dont know how far i wl be able to keep this up. for the past 2/3 weeks, its like all the strong emotions n thoughts which i had kept at bay for the past year are now flooding me in one instant. this happens when u dont obey your own self. serves me right for ignoring myself.